Why I don't go to see chick-flicks

My mom wanted to see "The Help" on Thursday and asked me if I would go see it with her. I agreed to go see it. It looked like an enjoyable movie...for a chickflick.

I need to be honest, I'm not a chickflick fan. Mostly because they are too sentimental for me and 95% of the time they make you cry. And I hate crying.

If it were up to me we would have went to see an action film. I love action films - explosions, fist fights, car chases and hardly any need to make their audience cry.

Anyway, back to The Help. I knew going in that there would be obvious controversial themes seeing as the film took place in Jackson, Mississippi in 1963. What I didn't know was that there were far more serious scenes than the funny scenes they showed in the trailer.

Overall, its a great movie - Emma Stone is great as Eugenia "Skeeter" Phelan, a young woman who comes back to her hometown after graduating from Ole Miss, a little more outspoken, and educated than her contempories. And while Stone is great in the scenes that she is in mostly getting lots of laughs for her character's great comebacks, her performance is overshadowed by many of the characters.

Bryce Dallas Howard (Hilly Holbrook) plays her part well as the woman who basically runs the neighborhood and the society ladies of Jackson. You can't help but hate her from the start of the film as she carries herself to be far more superior among not only "The Help" but also her own friends to the point of influencing their decisions on how to "handle" their maids and their homelife.

Viola Davis is excellent as the meek and mild Aibileen Clark. The audience can see that there exists great pain in her past. She bears the weight of her pain in the slight slump in her shoulders and her slow gait. Aibileen holds much of her pain and sadness close to her heart, to the point of silence. Its not until she is given the opportunity to share her point of view of being a maid with Skeeter, that she slowly opens up about her history of being a maid and the stories that come with that life.

Octavia Spencer is great as the sassy Minnie Jackson, a fellow maid and confidant of Aibileen. Early on in the film she becomes a bit of an outcast and deemed unemployable by Hilly Holbrook for doing something ultimately deplorable (I won't spoil the fun, you have to see it to appreciate it). She is the second maid that comes to share with Skeeter her stories (good and bad) of being a maid. Minnie finally gets a job working for Celia Foote - a sweet young married woman who is labled a social outcast by none other than Hilly Holbrook.

Jessica Chastain plays country raised Celia Foote (my favorite character) with such naive sweetness you want to hug her and cheer for her as she tries so hard to fit in with the other society ladies in Jackson. Her downfall (or her greatest strength, however you may see it) is her inability to act superior to her maid, Minnie. Minnie is the one who tries to educate her in the employer/employee way of life in Jackson. However, to Celia, there is no distinction between them, and really in the end Celia needs a friend and finds that friendship in Minnie as she teaches her how to cook.

One of the scenes that made me cry sob was the scene in which Celia has locked herself in the bathroom and practically yells that Minnie she can go home. We learned early on when Celia and Minnie meet that Celia is newly pregnant.

I don't know why my brain went here, but it did. As soon as we hear the ruckus coming from the bathroom, and Celia's panicked pleas for Minnie to go home, I knew what was happening behind that bathroom door. I knew that Celia was miscarrying the baby...and I was right.

I cried hard for the next five to ten minutes, I had to put my fist in my mouth to keep me from making any sounds.

And I hated my mom for a split second for making me go see this movie. How dare she and this film make me relive something that I hate sharing or expressing. How dare this film make me cry.

That scene made the character of Celia Foote all the more tragic in my eyes. She voices her inadequacy of being a wife to Minnie, "What good am I here, if I can't give Johnny any children."

My heart broke when she said this, because how many of us, who struggle with IF have not said those exact words? "What good am I if I can't give my husband children?" I know I have.

I am blessed to be married to a great man like Michael, who reminds me every day that he married me and not my uterus.

Still, I hate crying - which is why I will be staying away from chick-flicks, at least for the next year.

"I Ain't Gonna Steal Your Kid, Lady."

I love going to the movies. I especially love some of the kids movies that come out. I'm a huge Pixar fan (however, I have yet to see 'Up', but its in my Netflix queue) and I like some of the Dreamworks films.

I especially loved "How to Train Your Dragon", that film was so clever and funny. I was really glad I made Michael come with me to see it.

I remember being in the lobby, balancing my Raisinets, Michael's Reeces and a bottle of water, walking back from the concessions to my seat. This little girl about 6 or 7 years old holding her own tray of popcorn, turned to me and asked me what movie I was here to see. I told her I was going to see "How to Train Your Dragon". She was so excited and told me that was the exact same movie she was going to see. She turned to her mother, who kept looking at me with this freaked out expression on her face, and told her "she's going to see the same movie we are, Mom."

This mom kept looking at me and the space around me, no doubt trying to see if I came with a child because then it might have been okay if her daughter was talking to me. She kept alternating her gaze from me to her daughter, and finally said to her, "that's great, do you know her?" "No," the little girl said. The mom quickly shooed her daughter away from me and said something to her about not talking to strangers.

All I kept thinking was, "I'm not gonna steal your kid, lady...she's too old and not very pretty." I do, after all, have standards.

I understand that this mom was just looking out for her daughter, but thanks for the confidence. Do I really look that menacing?

Flash forward to last Friday in the theatre waiting for Toy Story 3.  There were so many parents and kids. I don't think I saw another childless couple in the whole entire theatre. I seriously felt like I didn't belong at this particular movie. I felt scrutinized by all the parents there. I couldn't figure out if they were jealous of me and Michael, or if they were worried we might steal their kid during the movie.

I told Michael what had happened to me when we went to see "How to Train Your Dragon". He laughed and said we should have a t-shirt printed that says,

"Yes, I'm Infertile. No, I'm not going to steal your kid. She's too ugly."

Heehee :) That man of mine cracks me up and he really knows how to cheer me up.