How could I have forgotten...

Michael and I were watching Bones last Thursday night and one of the interns was commending Agent Booth for taking care of his Grandpa. Edison, the intern, continued to explain that he loved his own Grandfather and that his Grandfather never got to see what he became (a forensic anthropalogist). Dr Sayoran told him that his Grandfather would be proud of him.

I began to wonder if my Grandmother would be proud of me, of who I am today. She died when I was 17 and she never got to see me graduate from High School or College or meet Michael. Would she be okay with us adopting?

Yes. A voice answered immediately.

And then I remembered, my Grandmother spent a good portion of her life in an orphanage. When her mother died, her father sent her to an orphanage and kept her two younger brothers, because he couldn't be bothered raising a girl. She was only 3 years old and was never adopted. She aged out and became a nanny. She eventually got married and raised a family of her own.

How could I have forgotten she was in an orphanage?

I started crying, right there in the middle of watching Bones. And a strange peace came over me. Thanks God, and thank you Grama. The tears were happy tears and it helped in bringing me closer to the adoption process. I actually felt excited about it, which is certainly a breakthough.

I know I still have a long way to go, but its a start in the right direction.